This is the story as it appeared in the #modarchive IRC channel.  Enjoy!

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[00:38] * SLAM[CD-CoS] wonders if he should tell a story like Christofori does.
[00:39] <grl> as long as i'm not in it :P
[00:39] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Ah...
[00:39] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Yes, it was rather unfortuanate, wasn't it...
[00:39] <grl> yeah, i don't wanna be the witch lol
[00:39] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> lol
[00:39] <grl> with shit coloured skin
[00:39] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> I tihnk I can find something for you :-).
[00:39] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> LOL
[00:40] <grl> good, i'll be the beautiful princess with the perfect bod. and big titties and all that good stuff
[00:40] <NeZbiE> hey?
[00:40] <grl> oh wait, i already am!
[00:40] <grl> haha
[00:40] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Okay, but you'll be the mechanic.
[00:40] * NeZbiE slaps AcidDose around a bit with a large trout
[00:40] * NeZbiE slaps AcidDose around a bit with a large trout
[00:40] * NeZbiE slaps AcidDose around a bit with a large trout
[00:40] * NeZbiE slaps AcidDose around a bit with a large trout
[00:40] <grl> ooo the mechanic...
[00:40] * NeZbiE slaps [food]33 around a bit with a large trout
[00:40] * NeZbiE slaps [food]33 around a bit with a large trout
[00:40] * NeZbiE slaps [food]33 around a bit with a large trout
[00:40] <grl> NeZbiE!
[00:40] * NeZbiE slaps [food]33 around a bit with a large trout
[00:40] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Nezbie is begging to get kicked.
[00:40] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> (Isn't he?)
[00:40] <grl> no kidding
[00:40] * SLAM[CD-CoS] wonders if he's wrong.
[00:40] <grl> git NeZbiE
[00:40] <NeZbiE> Sorry
[00:40] * SLAM[CD-CoS] slaps NeZbiE around a three-inch programming book.
[00:40] <grl> goodnight!
[00:40] <NeZbiE> :((((
[00:40] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> :-)
[00:40] <NeZbiE> Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!
[00:41] <NeZbiE> I'm sorry
[00:41] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> *thwap*
[00:41] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Okay :-).
[00:41] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Yes.
[00:41] <NeZbiE> DONT BURN ME
[00:41] <NeZbiE> I DONT WANNA DIE
[00:41] <grl> go
[00:41] <grl> don't make me assist you in leaving
[00:41] * NeZbiE shrinks into a little hole
[00:41] <grl> if it's a quick one, i gotta go to bed in a few
[00:42] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> may take a while...
[00:42] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> I don't know :-S.
[00:42] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> I'll start anyway :-).
[00:42] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> K?
[00:42] <grl> sure
[00:42] <grl> wait!
[00:42] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> So...anyone else?
[00:42] <grl> i gotta put my clothes in the dryer
[00:42] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Okay.
[00:42] <grl> well you can start anyway i'll catch up when i get back
[00:42] <NeZbiE> Oooooh
[00:43] <NeZbiE> Soooo?
[00:43] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> The story is called, "Station #MA."
[00:43] <NeZbiE> ok
[00:43] <NeZbiE> Move along now
[00:43] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Our story begins as we see a beautiful princess with a perfect bod, big titties, and all that stuff, casually throwing her
clothes in the dryer.
[00:44] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Her name was "grl," and although she and others thought of her as a princess, by profession she was a starship mechanic.
[00:44] <NeZbiE> lol :)
[00:45] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> She was hurrying to dry her laundry and take her ship, the S.S. 32MB, to move into a new job at...
[00:45] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SPACESTATION #MA! *eerie echo.
[00:45] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Finally, the Atmoic Cryer (TM) made a "ding!" sound, signalling that the clothes were done after the 150ms tumble-dry cycle.
[00:46] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> *Er...Atomic Dryer.
[00:46] <grl> lol
[00:46] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> She tossed the clothes into a suitcase, and threw it into the trunk of her ship.
[00:46] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> She then jumped into the Trusty old S.S. 32MB's cockpit, and blasted off for SPACESTATION #MA! *eerie echo.
[00:47] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> LEaving her entire life behind her for her new job.
[00:47] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Well," she thought, "at least my brother won't ask me to babysit anymore."
[00:47] <grl> lmao
[00:48] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Finally, she jumped into TCPspace, and, after a 90ms journey, warped back out, and beheld SPACESTATION #MA! *eerie echo.
[00:49] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> There were several landing platforms to choose from, but looking at her ship's configuration, the nice controller gave her clearance to land on the Windows platform.
[00:49] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> She was met immediately by Brainwash, the reluctant mechanic of the station's EtherDrive.
[00:50] <grl> hehehe
[00:50] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Ay!," he said in a Scottish accent, "It's about time you were 'ere! The ports just had a pow'r surge and port 80's plum frozen over!"
[00:51] <grl> lol
[00:51] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Aren't ou supposed to fix that?" grl asked.
[00:51] <AcidDose> lol
[00:51] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Ay, lassie, I am," Brainwash said, looking her up and down for a second, "But I don't know crap about networkin'!"
[00:52] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Then why are you the engineer for the EtherDrive?"
[00:52] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Well, SLAM thought I could handle the job till he came back. But if we don't get this port 80 fixed, nO ONE'S going to be coming back, and we'll lose our position in the cyberspace-time contiunuum!"
[00:52] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> So grl rushed down to the reactor room with Brainwash immediately to check out the situation.
[00:53] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Sure enough, just as Brainwash had said, the port marked "80" was fused shut!"
[00:53] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> grl took out her red nail polish, and painted a red bullseye on the blocked port...
[00:53] <grl> lol
[00:54] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Then yanked out her three-foot-wrench, and gave the port a good beating.
[00:54] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> In seconds, port 80 was open and functioning again.
[00:54] <grl> yay
[00:54] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Needless to say, plenty of people were waiting for SPACE STATION #MA! *eerie echo. to get back on the net again, and so the poor controller was nearly swamped as ships poured in.
[00:55] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Some were just Tumbleweeds, who came and went, but they still confused the operators.
[00:55] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> grl rushed topside immediately to see if any ships needed assitance.
[00:55] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Of course, many of them did, especially those on the Windows platform.
[00:56] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> They were always experiencing breakdowns from iimproper maintenence and lack of good workmanship.
[00:56] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Ay, me!" Brainwash exclaimed, "at least this is some
werk I can doo!"
[00:56] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> He picked up his own three-foot-wrench and went to work immediately on a ship called the Christo_AW, belonging to one Christofori.
[00:57] <[food]33> OMG what is this?
[00:57] *** [food]33 is now known as TrenteTrois
[00:57] <grl> lol
[00:57] <grl> shush it's story time
[00:57] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> If Brainwash sucked at networking, he was at least a good mechanic, and grl was soon glad to have his help as the ships started landing.
[00:57] *** NeZbiE is now known as NeZbiE[A]
[00:57] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Finally, a ship that had remained silent to the ops the entire time made it's approach.
[00:57] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> It was the S.S. Trout, belonging to James-Bond.
[00:58] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> James-Bond apparently was a quiet type, and didn't even bother to acknowledge the ops, as he landed at his place on the Linux platform.
[00:58] <grl> hehe
[00:59] *** James-Bond has quit IRC (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
[00:59] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Well, shatter me shamrocks!" Brainwash exclaimed, "Ol' Jimmy there is needin' assistance! You finish up here, grl, I'm heading to the Linux platform!"
[00:59] <grl> LOL
[01:00] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> However, as soon as Brainwash got there, James-Bond had taken off again.
[01:00] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> But Brainwash had to stay because there was more coming his way.
[01:00] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> A ship called the S.S. NAB, belonging to SLAM, made it's approach.
[01:00] * grl has to go to bed :/
[01:00] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM's ship was different.
[01:01] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> It slipt in half, and half landed on the Windows platform, while the other half landed on the Linux platform.
[01:01] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> It was a "dual-booting drive" ship.
[01:01] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Ah, okay, gnit.
[01:01] <grl> see you tomorrow slam :)
[01:01] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> I'll save the chat :-).
[01:01] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Night :-).
[01:01] <grl> ok
[01:01] <grl> nite ;)
[01:01] *** grl is now known as grl[zz]
[01:01] <NeZbiE[A]> Hey, FINISH IT!
[01:01] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Okay :-).
[01:02] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> grl started flirting with SLAM, and as she worked they swapped their favorite sandwhich recipies.
[01:02] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> All of a sudden, Christofori walked over, and bludgeoned SLAM on the head with a piece of paper.
[01:03] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM greeted him cheerfully, and asked how his rondomizing code was coming. Looking at the wimpy piece of paper in his hand, Christofori replied, "Not so good."
[01:04] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Christofori immediately struck up an arguement with grl, and SLAM left them just as grl was pulling out her three-foot-wrench again.
[01:04] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM heeaded into the station, and went up three levels with the intention of finding some ph00d. It eluded him for several minutes, until he saw a vending machine clearly marked "ph00d."
[01:05] <NeZbiE[A]> lol
[01:05] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Inserting some csh into the machine (which he had retreived from the Linux half of his ship) SLAM purchased some SIMM chips, and began munching away happily.
[01:05] *** lateq has joined #modarchive
[01:06] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Suddenly, in walked none other than AcidDose, carrying threehundred bound sheets of paper.
[01:06] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "What are you doing?" SLAM asked him.
[01:06] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "I'm writing the code for my new tracker program," AcidDose replied, "It can rip voices from humans, animals, non-huimans, stars, and even other dimensions!"
[01:06] <NeZbiE[A]> Hehe :P
[01:07] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Yeah, sounds great," SLAM commented, "can I get a beta version of that sometime?"
[01:07] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Yes, of course," AcidDose replied happily, and gave SLAM a piece of paper with the address where he could pick up the beta.
[01:07] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Thanks," SLAM replied, "Will it run on my 486?"
[01:07] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> AcidDose made a kind of snorting noise, and walked on.
[01:08] <NeZbiE[A]> =D (you have a 486??)
[01:08] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> In the meantime, the arguement outside between grl and Christofori had escalated.
[01:08] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> (Yes, I'm on it right now :-).)
[01:09] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> grl was now pounding away at him with a slightly bent three-foot-wrench, while Christofori was desperately hammering his randomizer module to spit out a good weapon.
[01:09] *** lateq has quit IRC (Quit: )
[01:09] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Finally, it surrendered a "golf clup," which isn't quite like a golf club, but good enough for Christofori's purposes,
[01:10] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> grl tried radioing the ops to send down security, but the ops were too busy trying to keep the incoming ships from speaking in French.
[01:10] <NeZbiE[A]> =D
[01:11] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> grl pulled out a remote control, and summoned the maintenence bot, ModStats, to come over and help her.
[01:11] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> ModStats couldn't do much physically, but he did make note of one of Christofori's comments, and posted it all over the station to embarrass him.
[01:11] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> :-)
[01:11] <NeZbiE[A]> :)))
[01:12] <NeZbiE[A]> :)))))))) (Take off that nose!!!)
[01:12] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Humiliated and defeated for a time, Christofori climbed back aboard his own ship.
[01:12] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> LOL
[01:12] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Meanwhile, a ship called the "n00b" belonging to NeZbiE, finally pulled toward th station.
[01:12] <NeZbiE[A]> GO me!
[01:12] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Under the threat of being kicked, NeZbiE had finally stopped talking in French and trying to smack the ops with a Rather Large Trout (TM).
[01:13] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Yes, go you :-).
[01:13] <NeZbiE[A]> :P
[01:13] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Taking his example, his friend TrenteTrois also landed on the Windows platform.
[01:13] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Soon, a ship jumped in that had the shape of a cat.
[01:14] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> The side of the ship, which was shaved of fur, read "S.S. Pokkit."
[01:14] *** Christo_AW is now known as Christofori
[01:14] <Christofori> I am back.
[01:14] * Christofori wallops SLAM[CD-CoS] with a remote control!
[01:14] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> BardCat was the pilot, and he landed it on the little-used OS/2 platform.
[01:14] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Hi :-).
[01:14] <NeZbiE[A]> LOL :)
[01:14] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Read up, Christofori, SLAM's the storyteller tonight, w00t :-D!
[01:14] <Christofori> ah
[01:15] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Hey!" BardCat yelled, "Can't a Canadian get some service around here?"
[01:15] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "No!" grl yelled over from the Windows platform, "No one here knows any OS/2!
[01:15] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "
[01:16] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Disappointed, BardCat tried unsuccessfully to anger all the occupants of the station, and then took off again for his home planet, Quebec.
[01:16] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Thanks to the quick and skilled work of grl and Brainwash, the ships that had landed were speedily repaired, ahppied up, and sent on their way.
[01:17] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> At least, they were SUPPOSED to be sent on their way.
[01:17] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> The ops had fallen asleep from the rough time they'd had keeping everyone from speaking French.
[01:17] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> So everyone just hung around chatting.
[01:18] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM and AcidDose were sitting in the dining hall again, and AcidDose was telling him yet more about his new tracker. "Yes, all it does is produce chiptunes, because chiptunes rock."
[01:18] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM heartily agreed, although he had no tracking skill.
[01:18] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Suddenly, ModStats rolled in.
[01:18] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> It then switched from wheels to stubby feet, and waddled on over to SLAM.
[01:19] <NeZbiE[A]> :P
[01:19] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Christofori really wanted everyone to know what he was doing: 273 descriptions in all! Runner-up: SLAM[CD-CoS] with 272 total descriptions."
[01:20] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM, of course, was outraged, and dashed out to the landing pad to meet Christofori, the whole time readying his new Ninjutsu presets.
[01:20] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> However, SLAM was in for a surprise.
[01:21] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> A ship called the S.S. Knife, piloted by none other than X-Acto, decided to jump out of TCPspace and barnstorm the Windows platform while the ops were asleep.
[01:21] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> He slashed past the door to the inside area just as SLAM was walking out...
[01:21] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> BLAMMO!
[01:21] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM went flying into outer cyberspace.
[01:21] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> X-Acto, listening to loud music, didn't even notice the impact as he went around for another pass.
[01:22] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Christofori, against his principles, had fallen asleep in his ship, and didn't know what was happening.
[01:22] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> grl ducked and ran for cover as X-Acto came around again.
[01:23] <Christofori> lol
[01:23] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Just then, pilotbris jumped out of TCPspace in his fighter, and targeted X-Acto's engines, seeing what was happening.
[01:23] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> X-Acto took a direct hit, and had to use the last of his power to emergency land on the Windows platform.
[01:23] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> (Ah, caught up, I see :-).)
[01:23] <Christofori> yup :P
[01:23] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> He knocked over grl's multi-drawer tool set, which really pissed her off.
[01:24] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Although she had broken her three-foot-wrench fighting Christofori, she picked up the two halves, and attacked X-Acto akimbo.
[01:25] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> The *thwack* of the one-and-a-half-foot-wrenches woke up the ops, and they soon had control of the situation.
[01:25] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> They kicked X-Acto immediately for the damage he caused. They were going to kick guiltbris too, but...
[01:25] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> pleasurebris taught them something they didn't know how to do, so they let him stay.
[01:26] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> joyousbris whooped so loudly, that he woke the sleeping dragon that was Christofori.
[01:26] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Christofori remembered his secret weapon, the powerful 1000-foor lightsaber OF DOOM! *eerie echo.
[01:27] <Christofori> lol
[01:27] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> He pulled it out, and leapt from his cockpit yelling.
[01:27] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> grl's eyes went wide.
[01:27] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> She ran.
[01:28] <AcidDose> wow, i'm making crazy music today lol
[01:28] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "What the blinkin' bloody blazes is..." Brainwash began as he walked back onto the Windows platform. He was just in time to see Christofori's saber swing across in a wide arc that cut through half the station.
[01:28] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Meanwhile, AcidDose was still in the dinner hall making crazy music, and felt the floor vibrate.
[01:28] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> He packed up his code (now 350 pages long) and left.
[01:29] <Christofori> sounds about right..
[01:29] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Christofori saw the damage he caused, and saw the ops frown at him. The ops, fortuanately, were having a good time up theree at the moment though, so the y let him off the hook when we shut the lightsaber off.
[01:29] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> *when he
[01:30] *** HyoCHAN has joined #modarchive
[01:30] <Christofori> lol
[01:30] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Suddenly, one last ship, belonging to HyoCHAN, exiting TCPspace, and made a nose-dive for the Windows platform.
[01:31] <HyoCHAN> :D
[01:31] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> He hit the platform at and angle, and bounced off, at the same time smashing into Shristofori.
[01:31] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> His ship flew off into outer cyberspace, carrying Christofori with it, and HyoCHAn was thrown clear into the ops post of the station.
[01:31] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Christofori realized he only had one chance left.
[01:32] *** TrenteTrois has quit IRC (Quit: )
[01:32] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Using the powers he had only written about so far, he looked deep inside the SPACE STATION #MA! *eerie echo. to located grl. He did so, and activated his lightsaber one last time.
[01:32] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> It stabbed through the shielding.
[01:32] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Piereced the outer hull plateing.
[01:32] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Broke open a bulkhead.
[01:32] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Shot through the wall.
[01:32] <Christofori> Go me!
[01:32] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> And grl barely saw the blade coming in time to duck...
[01:33] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> It singed her perfect hair, but worse than that, it flew into the reactor, and smashed right into the already-faulty port 80!
[01:33] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Immediately, tremors were felt all over...SPACESTATION #MA! *eerie echo.
[01:34] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> The ops, ironically, had just finished what teachbris had taught them, and thought that the station rocking was their fault
[01:34] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> They scrambled about in confusion.
[01:35] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> HyoCHAN, having been unconscious for several minutes, woke up suddenly, with the ship rocking all about.
[01:35] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> *Er...station.
[01:35] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> He looked for his ship, but soulcn't see it anywhere. He would have to hitch a ride somewhere...
[01:35] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> As he dashed through the hall, he turned a corner, and ran into good old AcidDose.
[01:36] <HyoCHAN> <(^-------^)>
[01:36] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Ran into him so hard in fact, that HyoCHAn got knocked cold again.
[01:36] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> AcidDose, however, had the most messages in the entire station, according to ModStats, and didn't want to uin his
reputation, so he picked HyoCHAN up and carried him off to his ship.
[01:37] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> ModStats tried to follow, but suddenly a bulkhead marked "" tumbled from the ceiling and smashed his little boxy body.
[01:37] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Meanwhile, grl's perfect bod was down in engineering, desperately trying to fix the damage Christofori's lightsaber had caused.
[01:38] <Christofori> Ah yes, back to the good part :)
[01:38] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Suddenly understanding the stress of an engineer's job, she immedately developed an accent like Brainwahs's.
[01:38] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Indeed :-).
[01:38] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Brainwash ran immediately into the engine room.
[01:39] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Mye stars, lassie, what've yeh done with me precious ports?!?" he exclaimed in his very perturbed and perturbing Scottish accent.
[01:39] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Who are you talking to?" grl demanded, "you already said you suck at networking!"
[01:40] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Brainwash shut up, and went back topside to repair the ships, in case they needed to evacuate.
[01:40] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> grl kept rewiring stuff, crawling through tight tubes full of blinking lights, using a machette to slash through hanging cords, and the like, until she found what she was looking for.
[01:41] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Her two-foot, eleven-ish-wrench.
[01:41] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> A three-foot-wrench would be just too big for this job.
[01:41] <Christofori> lol
[01:42] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Painting port 80 once again with a bullseye with her red nail polish, She hurled the wrench into port 80, closing the circuit, and restoring their position in the cyberspace-time continuum.
[01:42] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> However, there was a slight lurch as they regained their balance...
[01:42] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> And ModStats had taken that oppurtunity to go for a waddle out on the Linux platform.
[01:43] <Christofori> heh.. !seen ModStats :)
[01:43] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> He went flying into space babbling "1370 lines, 1253 lines, 943 lines..." as he flew.
[01:43] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Yeah :-).
[01:44] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> The lurch also made it so that SLAM and Christofri landed right in front of each other on the Windows Platform.
[01:44] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM immediately
[01:44] * SLAM[CD-CoS] assumes Ichimonji no Kamae (defensive posture).
[01:44] * Christofori enables his protective anti-Slam sheilding
[01:44] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> To which Christofori replied with his randomzing script...
[01:44] * Christofori teases SLAM[CD-CoS] with an uzi!
[01:44] <Christofori> hehe
[01:44] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> While also enabling his protective anti-slam shielding.
[01:45] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> (Good job :-).)
[01:45] <Christofori> tx
[01:45] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM just couldn't resist the uzi, and went right for it...
[01:45] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> And Christofori fired it...
[01:45] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> However, he had messed something up in his script...
[01:45] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Spelling it "uzi" instead of "UZI"
[01:45] * Christofori A@&N(Q*NQW*WQ()M!*)
[01:45] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> And it misfired.
[01:45] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Igniting the entire magazine...
[01:46] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> And blowing both of them back into space in opposite directions.
[01:46] * Christofori goes into Matrix Mode (TM)
[01:46] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> totherescuebris manned his ship immediately, and flew off to pick up Christofori, since opinionatedbris thought that SLAM was too new to SPACESTATION #MA *eerie echo. to be rescued first.
[01:47] <Christofori> Aww :)
[01:47] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Luckily, though, SLAM ran headfirst into the cat-shaped ship of BardCat.
[01:47] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> It saved him, but...
[01:47] <Christofori> It also raped him!
[01:47] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "NO NO NO NO NO!" SLAM screamed and kicked as the S.S. Pokkit touched down on the OS/2 platform.
[01:48] <Christofori> lol
[01:48] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM knew what was coming next, so he tried to run from the ship.
[01:48] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> However, he didn' tknow how to "run" things in OS/2, so he head to learn to walk all over again, as he slowly but surely made it to the door.
[01:48] <Christofori> lol
[01:48] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Finally, he reached it, and said, "I'm never using OS/2 again."
[01:49] <Christofori> lol.. it's like a bad trip :)
[01:49] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> BardCat, however, had jumped out of his ship, lugging along his massive rudely-named IRC client with him.
[01:49] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Yes :-).
[01:50] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM, having made it to the station area, ran immediately to the dinner hall for some ph00d.
[01:50] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> BardCat caught up with him, and saw the strange vending machine.
[01:50] <Christofori> Meanwhile, Christofori had just polished off his other Kit-Kat bar..
[01:50] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "ph00d?" he questioned mockingly, trying to annoy
SLAM, "ph00d is gay."
[01:51] <Christofori> ph00d is gay!
[01:51] <Christofori> lol
[01:51] <Christofori> I've got a /gay alias for just that reason :)
[01:51] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Christofori would have answered him from his bar, the Kit-Kat, but he was floating in outer cyberspace on slowbris's ship.
[01:51] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> :-)
[01:52] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM ignored BardCat as he deposited more csh into the vending machine and received a pack of GeForce 2 gum.
[01:53] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> BardCat, not about to give up this time, followed SLAM to the Kit-Kat, where SLAM nicely decided to take over for Christofori, who was his friend anyway.
[01:53] * SLAM[CD-CoS] walks behind the bar, pulls out a rag, and starts polishing the bar top.
[01:53] * Christofori mixes up a martini for SLAM[CD-CoS].
[01:53] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> BardCat sits at the bar, asking for a dirnk.
[01:53] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> (You're not back yet.)
[01:54] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> scr00dbris started having engine trouble, and couldn't quite get back to SPACESTATION #MA! *eerie echo. right away.
[01:54] <Christofori> I know; I was going to keep it cold for ta
[01:54] <Christofori> ya
[01:54] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> He tapped on the engine housing behind his seat.
[01:54] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> And tapped it some more.
[01:54] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> cluelessbris kept tapping, not realizing the damage he was doing.
[01:55] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Finally, the engine housing blew up, sending Christofori and shockedbris hurtling toward the statino again.
[01:55] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> They flew...
[01:55] <Christofori> poor Arlenbris..
[01:55] <Christofori> Dah!
[01:55] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> hit the window surrounding the dinner hall....
[01:55] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Crashed through...
[01:55] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> And didn't stop...
[01:55] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM was just about to put a martini in his paint haker.
[01:56] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Christofori flew into the machine, followed by accidentalbris, who bumped up the shake time on his way in as well.
[01:56] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> The door slammed shut.
[01:56] <Christofori> uh oh..
[01:57] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM, not knowing what had happened, hit the start butotn out of instinct...
[01:57] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> And the paintshaker started.
[01:57] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM soon realized there was something wrong, because the machine was hopping and bouncing as if it had a lot of extra weight in it.
[01:57] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> However, it was bouncing and hopping so much, that he couldn't hit the off switch.
[01:58] * Christofori is dizzy..
[01:58] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> So Christofori and shaken-not-stirredbris were trapped in the wobbling machine with a martini, which Christofori
immediately drank.
[01:59] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Just then, James-Bond returned, and entered the bar, uttering the only line he had said in the last week "Get me a mrartini, shaken, not stirred."
[01:59] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM thought, "You have no idea..."
[01:59] * SLAM[CD-CoS] pulls out his flak cannon.
[01:59] * SLAM[CD-CoS] aims his flak cannon straight at paint_shaker and triggers a speedy metal spray!
[01:59] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> The machine shut down, finally, and he popped open the door.
[02:00] <Christofori> Sheesh! Why didn't you just unplug it??
[02:00] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> He pulled out a mertini can, which he noticed was unreasonably heavy..
[02:00] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> .And poured it in James-Bond's martini glass.
[02:00] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Out popped a drunk, confused Christobris.
[02:00] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> That's right, folks, the shaking can combine more things than just drinks.
[02:01] *** Christofori is now known as Christobris
[02:01] *** Christobris has quit IRC (Killed ( (Christofori(?) <-[ircd@localhost])))
[02:01] *** Christobris has joined #modarchive
[02:01] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> lol
[02:01] <Christobris> doh!
[02:01] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Librifori looked around in utter confusion. "Huh...wha?" he managed to stammer out.
[02:02] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Not knowing exactly what to do at the moment, Cribolibri walked into a corner and began to do what he did best.
[02:03] <Christobris> lol
[02:03] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM, James-Bond, and BardCat watched speechlessly, unsure of what to do.
[02:03] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Finally, grl and Brainwash came into the bar.,
[02:04] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Blow up the Blarney Blast!" Brainwash exclaimed, "not again!"
[02:04] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "You mean this has happened before?" SLAM asked.
[02:04] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Ay, laddie, it has," grl answered.
[02:04] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "grl, is that a..." SLAM began to ask, wondering about the scottish accent.
[02:04] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Ay, laddie, it is," grl answered.
[02:05] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Well, then, can you..." SLAM started again.
[02:05] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Ay, laddie I can," grl answered.,
[02:05] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "WILL YOU STOP THAT?!?" SLAM yelled.
[02:05] <Christobris> Hahah!
[02:05] *** Christobris is now known as Libtofori
[02:06] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Nay, laddie," grl answered, when you've been workin' as a mechanic as long as I 'ave, it sorta tekes o'er."
[02:06] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> :-)
[02:06] <Libtofori> No! Never!
[02:06] *** Libtofori is now known as Christobrilib
[02:06] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Thanks for names :-).
[02:06] <Christobrilib> They're random each time I type
[02:06] *** Christobrilib is now known as Librifori
[02:06] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> :-)
[02:07] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> grl grabbed Librifori's hair as Brainwash Christobrilib in the butt.
[02:07] * Librifori flashes his large 1000-ft light-sabre around violently.
[02:07] <Librifori> ha!
[02:07] *** Librifori is now known as Christobrilib
[02:07] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Out popped Christofori, while traumatizedbris sat there, still doing what he did best.
[02:08] <Christobrilib> Oh..
[02:08] *** Christobrilib is now known as Librifori
[02:08] <Librifori> oops!
[02:08] *** Librifori is now known as Libtobris
[02:08] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> lol
[02:08] *** Libtobris is now known as Christofori
[02:08] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Ay, a day o' celebration!" grl declareed.
[02:08] * Christofori is dazed and confused
[02:08] <Christofori> Yes!
[02:08] * Christofori concocts a wine cooler for everyone in the house!
[02:08] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> grl and Brainwash jumped into traditional Scottish outfits, then climbed up onto the bar to dance.
[02:09] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Brainwash made up a clever Irish song describing the occassion, which was so good that no one remembers it to this day.
[02:09] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Mostly because of Christofori's wine cooler, which contained Nutrasweet, which made everyone forget the details.
[02:09] <Christofori> lol
[02:09] * Christofori shakes up a shot of tiquila for everyone in the house!
[02:09] <Christofori> A Toast for SLAM[CD-CoS]! Here's to SLAM[CD-CoS]! May you have good fortune!
[02:10] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Thank you :-).
[02:10] <Christofori> np
[02:10] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Christofori, sat in a corner, rubbing his head, wondering why his luck was so rotten today, while contentbris sat in the
opposite corner and...yeah, still.
[02:11] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Everyone was so happy, that they forgot about something.
[02:11] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Two things, actually.
[02:11] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Suddenly, SLAM signalled everyone to quiet down.
[02:11] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> He turned on the raido.
[02:11] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> They all gathered round and listened carefully.
[02:11] <Christofori> radio on a space station.. lol
[02:11] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> It was a broadcast from ModStats, floating out in space!
[02:12] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> (Exactly :-) remember, this is like 1950's scifi, with things like grl's atmoic clothes dryer.)
[02:12] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> They could only determine one thing...
[02:12] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> As they looked amongst themselves, they relaized that NeZbiE and TrenteTrois were not amongst them!
[02:13] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> In horror they looked out the window, and as the voices on the radio screamed th French version of "Aiiiiiieeeeeeee!" they saw two very fast moving ships coming towards to window.
[02:13] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> The ships smashed into the bar
[02:13] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> hit the opposite bulkhead...
[02:13] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> knocked loose the beam, which kicked half the people in the room.
[02:14] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Everyone was on the floor.
[02:14] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM was behind the bar, and the first to look up and behold on final object.
[02:15] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> A small, boxy object with short waddling legs, flying, and screaming at the top of his lungs, "WARHAWK COULDN'T DECIDE WHETHER OR NOT TO STAY, AND JOINED #MODARCHIVE TWENETY-SEV...!!!"
[02:15] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM's eyes widened as the flailing bot rushed in and smacked him right in the face.
[02:16] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Upon creaming SLAM's head into the wall, ModStats finished quietly "...times."
[02:16] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> However, a disastrous thing had happened.
[02:16] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SLAM's head and hit a switch on the wall...
[02:16] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Which turned on a light..
[02:16] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Which pulled far to omuch power...
[02:16] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> and overloaded a relay.
[02:16] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> which blew, sending a surge down to engineering...
[02:17] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Which blasted port 80 yet again.
[02:17] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> grl had been kicked when the beam had fallen, and SLAM was...let us say incapacitated.
[02:17] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> That left only one person who might, just MIGHT be able to fix the faulty port 80 again.
[02:17] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> BRAINWASH *eerie echo.
[02:18] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Brainwash dashed downstairs, for the first time in...however long...being so scared that he managed to drop the Scottish accent.
[02:18] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> He saw that the problem was the same...
[02:18] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Port 80 was a broken circuit.
[02:19] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> There was nothing with a length of two feet and eleven inches, except, except...
[02:19] <Christofori> oh no...
[02:19] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Pointing one arm straight down, and thrusting his right elbow out, he leapt headfirst into port 80, closing the circuit!
[02:19] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Once again, someone has heroically save SPACESTATION #MA! *eerie echo.
[02:20] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Betterbris finally recovered from his trauma, and fixed the bea, which brought everyone back again.
[02:20] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> And everyone was happy, even SLAM had recovered, and was serving drinks again.
[02:21] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Everyone was happy, of course, except Brainwash...
[02:21] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Who was channeling about 15 megabits per second down on port 80.
[02:21] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> "Hey, like I said, I don't know crap baout networking!" he reminded the people upstairs.
[02:21] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Everyone, however, thought he had done a splendid job, and drank a toast to him.
[02:22] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> And, as we leave this beloved space station, we see all our heroes, patrons, and friends, celebrating their adventures and victories for the day...
[02:22] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Here, on the magnificent...
[02:22] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> SPACESTATION #MA! *eerie echo.
[02:22] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> The End
[02:22] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> :-)
[02:22] * SLAM[CD-CoS] bows
[02:22] <Christofori> Bravo!
[02:23] <Christofori> Hurry and log it before you get kicked or killed by some random server
[02:23] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> It's being logged in real-time I beleive.
[02:23] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> I'm checking it now.
[02:23] <Christofori> ah
[02:23] <Christofori> good
[02:23] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> :-)
[02:23] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> I set it to log your story last night...
[02:23] <Christofori> I'll put it on my stories section if you want
[02:23] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> And it's been a-logging ever since.
[02:23] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> Okay :-)!
[02:24] <Christofori> Just DCC me a log of it
[02:25] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> I'll try, but I think I can't DCC past our router.
[02:25] <SLAM[CD-CoS]> LOL, the log is too big to read in Notepad :-).

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